What if…

What If..

  • What if you had 99 problems and they’re all bitches?
  • What if Prince’s doves never cried?
  • What if Michael Jackson didn’t “remember the time”?
  • What if Ice Cube didn’t have a good day?
  • What is Iggy Azalea wasn’t so fancy?
  • What if Duncan Mighty’s “Indian Girl” was actually Pakistani?
  • What if Madonna was not like a virgin?
  • What if it wasn’t Bobby Brown’s prerogative?
  • What if Michael Jackson wasn’t Bad?
  • What if 50 Cent wasn’t in da club?
  • What if Fela’s woman gree say she be lady?
  • What if School Boy Q wasn’t sitting in the studio?
  • What if Jack and Jill were afraid of heights?
  • What if Eminem didn’t forget about Dre?
  • What if Marvin hadn’t been eavesdropping at the grapevine?
  • What is Tupac’s baby didn’t cry?
  • What if Bob Marley shot the sheriff, and Peter Tosh shot the deputy?
  • What if Whitney Houston didn’t wanna dance with somebody?
  • What if Peter Tosh never really wanted to legalize it?
  • What if Aaliyah wasn’t more than a woman?
  • What if James brown was White and ashamed?
  • What if Ace Hood didn’t wake up in a new Bugatti?
  • What if Chris Brown thought dancing on a pole made women hos?
  • What if Adele lied about setting fire to rain?
  • What if it wasn’t 50 Cent’s birthday?
  • What if A$ap Rocky didn’t have fucking problems?
  • What if Biggie only had 11 Crack commandments?
  • What if Two Chainz isn’t so different?
  • What if Nicki Minaj had a pet poodle instead of an Anaconda?
  • What if Beyonce was merely tipsy in love?
  • What if Nigerian compatriots didn’t arise?
  • What if Faith Evans wasn’t really missing Biggie?
  • What if Biggie Smalls wasn’t ready to die?
  • What if Madonna didn’t Die Another Day?
  • What if Rick Ross was never promoted to Boss?
  • What if Rick Ross wasn’t really a free mason?
  • What if Kanye West really did say she was a gold digger?
  • What would happen if Kanye wasn’t watching the throne?
  • What if T-Pain didn’t buy her a drink?
  • What if Lil Wayne’s mirror hung on a tree?
  • What if Beanie man did not have the keys to the bimmer?
  • What if Jason Derulo couldn’t Wiggle, Wiggle, Wiggle?
  • What if Humpty Dumpty hadn’t climbed up that wall?
  • What if One Republic knew that it wasn’t too late to apologize?
  • what if NSYNC only said Bye, Bye twice?
  • What if R. Kelly was trapped in a closet for real?
  • What if Ludacris wasn’t disturbing da peace?
  • What if Ludacris didn’t have a ho in every damned area code?
  • What if Wyclef was really gone till November?
  • What if Big Sean really, really wanted to fuck with her?
  • What if Sade just enjoyed the sweetest taboo?
  • What if Wiz Khalifa sang green and white instead of Black and yellow?
  • What if Iyanya wanted more than her waist?
  • What if MI was actually a disputed champion?
  • What if Rick Ross sang “Toyota Music” instead of Aston Martin Music?
  • What if Nelly sang “Walk with me” instead of “ride with me”?
  • What if diamonds were only for a few weeks?
  • What if Bad Belle wasn’t allowed?
  • What if Nelly said it was too cold, put on a jacket, instead of its too hot, take off your clothes?
  • What if 2Shots sold the Original Copy?
  • What if Banky W’s “Lagos party” was an Ekiti affair?
  • What if Wizkid nor know road to Ojuelegba?
  • What if 2face actually had a Jamaican queen?
  • What if Will Smith was in Nigeria and sang ‘Welcome to Maiduguri”?
  • What if Eminem’s 8 mile was in fact 8 kilometers?
  • What if Christina Aguilera didn’t see a genie, but orijin in a bottle?
  • What if Nosa didn’t always prayed for you?
  • What if Beyoncé wasn’t so flawless?
  • hat if Mary’s little lamb was an undercover Llama?
  • What if Celine Dion didn’t drive all night, but all afternoon?
  • What if you didn’t wake up in a new Bugatti but a hand me down molue?
  • What if niggas were in orile not in Paris?
  • What if Destiny’s Child didn’t just survive?
  • What if she wants designers, Ferrari not your love and ‘she a hoe’ belonging to no one?
  • What if Amy Winehouse had stayed in rehab?
  • What if John legend meant ‘all of us’?
  • What if Tracy Chapman didn’t have a Fast Car?
  • What if there was no aboki inside ice Prince?
  • What if the madness wasn’t so free and Terry G wasn’t a G but a cock blocking snitch?
  • What if Faecbook didn’t face book?
  • What if Ed Sheeran loved till he was 70 then got a divorce on his 71st birthday?
  • What if P Square didn’t taste the money after all, but tasted cookies instead?
  • What if Funke didn’t pakurumo?
  • What if Rosie gave Blacky the dance?
  • What if Evi-Edna did not look before crossing?
  • What if Asa was the actual jailer?
  • What if Ifeoma actually married Felix Liberty?
  • What if nobody cared about Tupac and he really had no eyes on him?
  • What if the plantation boys were really plantation boys?
  • What if a blind beggar owns the copyrights to Shoki?
  • What if Tony Tetuila’s car wasn’t hit?
  • What if weird MC sang Beyonce’s “if I was a boy”
  • What if Efrebor does not wound?
  • What if Nobody danced after wizkid showed us his money?
  • What if the niggas in ojuelegba are oblivious of wizkid’s story?
  • What if Eminem never got toy soldiers as a child?
  • What if Sean Paul’s “Gimme the light” was a NEPA advert?
  • What if Mavin’s dorobucci was an Igbo song “Dorobuchi”?
  • What if DBanj doesn’t have the ‘koko’ after all?
  • What if Nigga Raw’s konji was really spiritual?
  • What if Ne-Yo was so sick of rap songs?
  • What if Pharrel was never happy?
  • What if Abba didn’t take a chance on me?
  • What if Chris brown’s hoes were actually loyal?
  • What if Drake never started from the bottom?
  • what if Prince partied like it was 1998?
  • What if Michel Jackson was just a thug, not a smooth criminal?
  • What if Jay-Z is no longer having such a hard knock life?
  • What if Donna Summers loved to love me, and not you?
  • What if she saw a chiropractor and did not hurt her head, her back, her pussy and her crack?
  • What if all the kings horses and all the kings men took Humpty to Abuja General Hospital and put him back together again?
  • What if all your Bitches were from Kano and you had 99 “Froblems”?
  • What if you reminded R. Kelly of a jacked up 1975 Datsun 120Y?
  • What if Madonna was not Like a Virgin, and had been touched many, many times, could I get my money back?
  • What if Luther Vandross didn’t dance with his father?
  • What if Madonna’ Papa didn’t even intend to preach?
  • What if Cyndi Laupers girls did not want to have fun? Could i get arrested?
  • What if Drake was on his best behavior?
  • What if Kelis’ milkshake didn’t bring all the boys to the yard?
  • What if Kelis’ milkshake only brought the boys to the library?
  • What if R. Kelly and Usher were actually dating the same girl?
  • What if Wande Cole didn’t like the booty, but the booby instead?
  • What if she didn’t “chop” P-Square, Akon & May D’s money because she wanted to chop their food?
  • What if it wasn’t game over for P Square and they had extra life?
  • What if Style Plus went to “papa put” instead of Iyabasira?
  • What if Chris Brown was a judge?
  • What if Asa was actually sleeping on a Bed of Stone?
  • What if Kat Deluna was really dreaming and Akon was just lying?
  • What if Luther Vandros bought water leaves instead of roses on his way home from work?
  • What if Twista couldn’t make her a celebrity overnight?
  • What if ABBA didn’t know it was a dude dancing n it was really a “dancing king?”
  • What if Alicia Keys couldn’t measure a woman’s worth?
  • What if Bruno mars didn’t want to be a billionaire but a bus conductor?
  • What if Kanye West was actually heartless?
  • What if Bruno Mars was locked out of Hell Fire?
  • What if Beyonce sang “single ladies” in Yoruba?
  • What if Waje’s wish really came through and she didn’t have a heart?
  • What if Kanye West is really lost in the world then?
  • What if MI was that Tall White Woman?
  • What if MI wasn’t even Rapper No 1 of Jos not to talk of Africa?
  • What if R. Kelly was a good man?
  • What if Lil Wayne wasn’t actually looking at the ‘mirror on the wall’?
  • What if Akon wasn’t ‘locked up’?
  • What if Akon wasn’t ‘lonely’ but instead had 600 belly Dancers?
  • What if Rihanna didn’t even have a single umbrella?
  • What if Tupac found out that there were no Thugz Mansion in heaven and all heaven got is a ghetto?
  • What if her bum bum was really bigger than Bombay?
  • What if she really shook her bum bum from Lagos to London?
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